February 16, 2024

Dear shwirly,

I have so much to catch you up on. Today is February 16, 2024. I turned 23 a little over a week ago. I am seeing this man, lets call him jake. That’s not his real name, but I’m trying to protect his privacy. Anyways, he’s a professor, a philosophy professor, and he’s a bit intense, has that philosophy professor zeal that you expect, ya know, the intensity, you can feel it in his presence, and it kills me, just a little bit. I’m not a lesbian. I am not. I fucking love dick and its crazy and beautiful and I feel alive. This year is so vastly different from last year. I am becoming. Constantly becoming. I went a bit MIA from my friends and I have to reconnect now, I was depressed a little bit, I can’t lie. Things felt a bit empty, and I think I’ve fallen out of love with my partner. And that’s okay. I still love her endlessly, I just lack the passion, and I;m okay with that. Anyways, I told him yesterday that I have a partner and I think that it hurt him and then I got super overwhelmed and anxious. I haven’t been going to radio meetings and that's okay. Anyways, I am also beginning research next quarter. I got into this OW Archive class, it was application only class and only 10 people were accepted, and I get a 1,000 scholarship at the end of the quarter after completion and I am very grateful for the opportunity. I am gay i am bi and i am straight and i am dimensional, i am ALL OF IT. I have a crush on my qs professor. They are a sexy mthrfcker. I am also moving into an art studio today, no pressure we’ll see how it goes. Also, I’m going to figure skate this weekend. Once a week at least, getting back into it. Can you tell I’m alive? Like, really, really alive? White blood cells pulsing and everything? I attached a poem below, changed the name for privacy reasons, just think it encapsulates this figment. 

Much love and talk soon.